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Emma Watson Returns From Several Dystopian Future!
Emma Watson may be a time traveller. I’m just saying, that this is a possibility. I mean we know she has the Time Turner, which would have been real useful in defeating Voldemort a shit load earlier, y’know before a whole ton of their friends died, but JK Rowling is just hoping we all quietly forget that part. Just look at these pictures!
Look, I know that we’ve seen this picture before, but I don’t think I quite did it justice the first time. I was slightly to busy talking about me threatening to murder the family of my nemesis, to quite talk about this picture probably. Which is a pity because this is an amazing picture and I probably wasn’t going to murder anyone. I always chicken out at the last minute. There I am, knife raised, and BAM, I lose my bloodlust. I should probably get nasal delivery spray, to keep my knife up longer so I can finish up on the whole killing thing. Wow. That was an inappropriate metaphor, in so many ways. Moving on.
The point I was making, is that this makes Emma Watson look like a time traveller. It’s very VictorianPunk. For those of you unaware of the VictorianPunk movement, it’s a lot like the Steam Punk movement, but with less metal cogs. For those you unaware of the Steam Punk movement, screw you, it’s awesome. It looks as though she has come from a strange future, where almost records of modern times have been erased and all they have left are pieces of the many, many films about Queen Victoria. But they kind of screwed it up, because it’s after the apocalypse and they can’t afford to use hoops in skirts, they must save them to use on all their Mad Max style cars, attaching spikes to them and launching them at roving bands of petrol thieves.
Future be crazy.
This time, we’ve gone with space fashions. This is a far further future, one where humanity has dragged itself, screaming and crying the whole way, up off the planet Earth and out into the black beyond that they call the cosmos, a mystical place where the mysteries of existence are found and explained in abundance, like where the spare socks disappear to. But I can just imagine how when I am time travelling and I wind up in the colonies on the belt, the ones built into the asteroids. I do like it out there. It’s quiet and fairly empty. There’s a lot of miners, the type that digs, not the small children, but there’s always a lot of travellers passing through. Interesting people there, mercs, bounty hunters, traders, smugglers, space ninjas. Me and Emma would fit right in there, her with her silver hour glass top and skills at space seat sitting, me with my skills at dealing with space trash.
This time, we’ve gone to the early days of Post-Mad Max style society, when people could spent more on making hotpants. That is a basic indicator of a societies wealth and social wellbeing, is hotpants. Think about it! How many hotpants do you see in Afghanistan? Or Somalia? Not many. Australia, though? Hotpants everywhere. It’s cos we’re Oprah rich. Here, Emma Watson is fitting into a society that is still obsessed with that whole “We barely survived the end of the world as a species” look, but, have moved past the “Every day is a hellish struggle for survival.” Which is definitely a plus in the fashion stakes.
Emma is the hottest time traveller I have ever seen, even hotter than those Nymphomaniac Jupiter Priestesses on Io in 2345. Man, that was a fun weekend.
5. Natalie Gulbis
This fine LPGA star began playing golf at just 3 ½ years old. She began posing for pictures in swimwear at age 21, and we’re very glad she did.
4. Heather Mitts
This ESPN2 and ABC sports reporter currently plays professional women’s soccer (yes there is a professional women’s soccer league).
3. Maria Sharapova
Need we say more?
2. Danica Patrick
Well known for Formula 1 (definitely) and Go Daddy (not really). I strongly suggest watching the godaddy.com ads.
1. Amanda Beard
This 27 year old Olympic swimmer looks good in gold (2004 Summer Olympics), she looks even better in her bikini.
i saw pandora’s box a while back now, but i am still enthralled with louise brooks. i really don’t know much about her, except she looks like she could be my wife forever. she’s like a rock n roll china doll before rock n roll was even invented. she is awesome and a badass.she was a dancer, a showgirl, and an actress, and back in the 1920s that took some balls.
so here she is, lulu brooks:
there are literally hundreds of different pictures, she was a well photographed woman, it seems.
